Jokes about Jas

- Yeah, who's your father?
- He is sick.
"But what is he doing?"
- Coughs.

Little Kasia is playing with the children on the beach. He runs to his mother crying:
"Mom, some kid hit me on the head!"
"Who was it, a boy or a girl?"
"I don't know because it was naked!"

The lady instructed the children to write an essay on “There is only one mother”. The next day, the lady asks the children:
– Anna??
– We love our mother the most, because Mother is only one..
- Very nicely..
Finally, it's Jaś's turn, so he reads:
“In the evening, when father and mother sat down at the table, they shouted at Małgosia to bring three bottles of choice from the fridge. Małgosia went to the fridge and shouted:
'Mother! There is only one!'”

“Mommy, the kids at school say I eat a lot.
- No, not Jas. Don't worry, it's not true, just eat soup because I need a bathtub.

"Mommy, the kids at school say I have big glasses!!"
– Jasiu, don't worry, take them off in the hall, wash your hands and come to dinner.
After some time, the drunk father comes home and calls from the threshold:
– Holy shit, who put the bike in the hall here!!!

Jasio asks his dad:

"Dad, how far is America?"
"Don't talk so much, but row!"

- Jasia, don't bite your nails - screams mom.
– Jasiu, I repeat, don't bite your nails.
- Jasia, damn it, don't bite your grandma's nails or I'll close the coffin!!!

The teacher asked the students to write an essay on the topic: "How do you learn?". Jasio wrote:
“The more a person learns, the more he knows. The more he knows, the more he forgets. The more he forgets, the less he knows. The less he knows, the less he forgets. So why study?!”

Tell me, Jasiu - they ask a little boy - is your mother sick that she is in bed?
And you to this:
- No, he's just afraid that his father will change his bed for vodka

"Mommy, the kids at school say I have big ears!"
- No, not Jas. Don't worry, it's not true, just don't shake your head like that, or it'll be draughty again.

The children were supposed to bring various items related to medicine to school. Małgosia brought a syringe, Kasia brought a bandage, and Basia brought headphones.
"And what did you bring?" - Jasia's teacher asks.
– Oxygen apparatus!
- Yes…? And where did you get it?
- From my grandfather.
"What about Grandpa?"
– Eeeeh… cheeee….

Jason is writing an essay. At one point, he turns to his father:
"Daddy, could you give me a sentence about the disaster?"
“There is not a drop of vodka in the house

At the construction site, during a school trip, the lady says to the children:
– It is very important to wear helmets. I knew a boy who didn't wear a helmet. One day a brick fell on his head and killed him on the spot. I also knew a girl who wore a helmet and when a brick fell on her head, she smiled and kept walking.
- I know her - says Jasiu - lives in our block. He still wears a helmet and smiles.

Jasio asks his dad:
Can you write with your eyes closed?
– I can!
- That's great. Sign me a few times in my diary.

Jaś returns home all wet.
-What happened? the mother asks.
We were playing dogs.
-So what?
-I was the lighthouse……. :-))

Who is a hypocrite? you ask in class.
-I know- this is a student who claims to like going to school- replies Jasio.

Upset mother to daughter:
"You know what happens to little girls who don't eat everything on their plate?!
“I know, they stay thin, they model and they make a lot of money…

– I forbid you to use bad words – reprimands Jasia's father.
– But dad, these words were used by Mikołaj Rej!
"Then don't play with him anymore!"

After checking homework in elementary school…
– Not a single addition operation is done correctly!!!
"But it wasn't me doing my homework, it was my dad!!!"
"And who is he?"
- A waiter...

- Jasiu, what part of speech is the word "monkey"?
- This is the past tense of the noun man

– Daddy, I saw our neighbor chasing a bus starting from the bus stop…
-And what? "I set him on our Rex and he made it…"

On a school trip in the forest, Jasio points to blueberries and asks the teacher:
"What is it, sir?"
– Jasiu's black berries.
"And why are they red?"
Because they're still green!

There is a lesson. The lady is playing guessing games with the children. Children ask you riddles, and you try to answer them as far as your (modest) possibilities. It's Jason's turn. Jaś gets up and asks:
"What's long, red, and stops a lot?"
The red-faced lady exclaims:
"Jasiu, how can you do such dirty things..."
And you are happy about it:
– It's a bus, ma'am, but I like your way of thinking!

A lady at school asks Jasia:
– Tell me who it was: Mickiewicz, Słowacki, Norwid?
- I do not know. And do you know who Zyga, Chudy and Kazek were?
"I don't know," replied the surprised teacher.
"What are you threatening me with with your gang?"

Jasiu comes home from school and shouts:
- Mom, mom, I did a good deed today.
- Then speak.
– Colleagues put a pin point up on the teacher's chair. He was about to sit down when I pulled out the chair...

Jason comes home. Mom screams:
"Why are your hands so dirty?"
Because I was playing in the sandbox.
"But why are your fingers clean?"
"Because I whistled at the dog."

Lady at school to Jasia:
– Jasiu, your behavior is scandalous! Tomorrow you will bring your father to school!
Jasio to this (calmly):
"I don't have a father."
"What happened to him?" asks the surprised teacher.
“The roller ran over him.
"Then let mother come."
“Mother was also run over by a roller.
- Do you have a grandfather? she said with a bit of doubt.
- No.
"He was run over by a roller too?" the question showed almost astonishment.
- Yes.
– And grandma?
- Too.
"But I suppose you have an uncle or an aunt who escaped that terrible death?" she asked doubtfully.
- No. - Jasia's voice was as calm as at the beginning - Everyone was run over by a roller.
- Poor Jason! What will you do now? The teacher began to feel sorry for him.
"Nothing," replied the resolute Jasio. "I'm going to keep rolling."

Jasia complains to her mother:
“Mom, the kids say I'm a vampire.
– Don't worry and eat this borscht faster because it will coagulate!

Biology lesson.
– What is the name of the largest animal living in our forests?
– Miss Jasia asks.
– Ring.
"A bear, perhaps?"
"If you don't bear, then I don't know."

The family is eating dinner quietly, until suddenly Jasiu bursts in and yells:
– Mom, grandma, sister, Daddy hanged himself in the attic.
Everyone throws spoons and plates and rushes up the stairs, and Jasiu calmly:
- April Fool's Day…
So everyone a big "UFFFFF"...
And Jasiu ends:
- … in the basement…